Contemplate

Ever just been up at night and all you do is think
Think of all the things that have ever happened to you
The good, the bad and the straight up ugly
Some of it makes me want to laugh so loud that I can probably wake up my entire neighborhood
Others of it just makes me want to cry from the pain ad hurt that it has caused me
Life is just so fragile
I never really realized that for some odd reason
I was too busy caught up in the past to realize that life was starting to pass me by
For so long I have watched life happen and have not participated in it
I was either too afraid or too comfortable to ever reach out and try something different
It literally hurts to think of all the years that I wasted because I was to afraid
I was too comfortable, too hard shelled and behind so may walls that even the biggest tank couldn't get me out
For so long I always said that if somebody wanted to get to me that they had to go through all of these steps and crack what seemed like a "secret code"
But now I have come to realize that, that is not the case at all
It is time for me to come out of all this protective covering that I have put myself in and start being me
It is not their job to crack the code it is my job to let my walls down and let my past go
Yes I'll still get hurt, yes I'll wanna put those walls back up but I refuse to go there again
I'm starting to get freedom and now that I have had a taste there is no going back
So Bye-Bye to my past and Cheers to my future