Just don't know

Sometimes I don't know whether I'm being forgiving or just plain naive. Yeah I came home for break and had a great time and then I talked to you while I was home. I forgave you for all the wrong you did to me and know just wanted to try friendship, it's failed times before now but I still wanted to try. Of course just trying to be the nice person I let you in again and again you let me down. Why does it seem that I have to be so stupid, to think with my heart instead of my head and my spirit. My heart keeps saying give another chance but my head is telling me that you've been down this road before. I'm tired of people disappointing me and taking me for granted. Just because I help people does not mean I don't myself have a desire to be loved, and cared for and adored and just not overlooked. Why must I be overlooked by so many people. They think they know me or see who I really am but the sad part is that half of the people that think they know me don't know even half of the things about me. God please just help me on this bumpy road that seems to have been going on for so long. I want to forgive and get over stuff but also now be naive to who people really are.

Helping people that's what I'm called to do right
God has showed me so many different times that helping people see who they are in him is what I am to do
Yet everytime I do it, it backfires in my face
For some people I'm like their mother and I comfort them when they need it
For some people I'm a friend and I just listen to their problems and help them when they are in a sticky situation
I try as hard as I can to be there for people but it never seems enough
I give them my all but my all is never enough
God I know that you put this calling on my life to help your people but the more I help the more people push me away
The more that i show that i care the more that in a situation i tend to come out with the broken heart
I try to be a good friend and never judge nor criticize but it seems that it again backfires on me
If you don't want my advice then why do you come to me
If that's what you want to do with your life then go ahead and do it
I don't wanna run your life, I'm just here to help
God please help me I don't wanna give up on people but they make it hard to stick with em

Dear Period,
   You come around the same time every month. You give me cramps, bloating, irritability and oh lets just mention the aches and pains.You also give me this burning desire to cuddle and desire male affection which I don't really appreciate but I have to deal with. I want somebody to hold me in their strong arms and make me feel ok while I'm in pain but oh yeah don't have one of those. This relationship that we have period disrupts my way of thinking and interferes in my life and I don't appreciate it! So I think that you need to leave my body and my mind alone! I like these terms and you need to accept them too.Kthanksbye!

Waiting

Waiting
Such an easy word yet such a hard thing to do
It seems like whenever I decide to wait 50 things happen to make it even harder
In waiting I tend to get impatient because it's not happening when I want it to
I say that I'm waiting on God but yet I try to do things in my own power
Doing things in my own power never worked out for me and yet my mind still continues to want too
Waiting is apart of the commitment that I made to God to wait for my future husband
It goes good at first and I'm very strong in that belief
Then something happens and it seems like the waiting seems not even worth it
I see all the happy couples, the people getting married, the people falling in love and I think where's mines
Then I start to second guess myself and maybe that waiting on God isn't worth it
That lasts for sometime but in my spirit and in my heart I know that God will take care of me
When it's my time to date it will come, when it's my time to fall in love it will happen
Right now just isn't the time so I have to wait and be patient and stop letting my mind get me and the people around me that say I should be dating by now, ignore them
The 1 that is for me will show up in God's timing and not my own
I would rather it happen in God's timing and not my own because my time sucks
God knows what I need and not what I want
I would so rather have what I need rather than what I want
"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these shall be added to you" Matthew 6:33
"A man that findeth a wife, findeth a good thing" Proverbs 18:22
The one for me will find me and I shall be found doing my father's business!
Until that time I shall wait.....