Why I hate religion but Love Jesus

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY

This video shows the truth of who God is and how the church shouldn't be run by religion but by God's grace, mercy and love. He is a wonderful counselor a loving God and we should be representations of him and not what this world is!

My life as of now

How many people do I like/am attracted to right now?

2 and a possible

1 white boy, 1 boy from another church and the other one is just sexual attraction(which is not cool)

Guess how many people like me, NONE!

Oh Joy! -________-

Welcome to the land of the single for 3 years.

What am I doing wrong?!?!

It's Hard

It's Hard to be around all the people that are falling in love

I mean it's cute to see them fall in love and begin to move forward in their lives

But it's hard when you have been single for 3 years and have no perspective people in your life

I know that things will come in due time but it's still hard to sit and act like it doesn't affect me

It gets hard to know that I am about to be 20 years old and there is no one that even likes me

I feel like my personality scares a lot of people off but I don't mean too

It's just that I am a very bold, outgoing, crazy person that just loves life and tries to find the joy in everything

But that shouldn't scare people off

I know that you may see all of that on the outside but you have to look at the inside too

I am a sensitive, caring, loving, gentle person and I wish that someone could see that

Why must I be overlooked all the time?

I am just the crazy girl that everyone knows that counsels people and is like a mother because God has blessed me with a spirit of wisdom

I often wonder what am I doing wrong that is leaving me in the dust with relationships

What is so wrong with me that I can't get anyone who wants to stay in my life and love me for just being me and not what I can do for them

What am I doing wrong, What is wrong with me?

I am waiting on God but I still pose the question, What is wrong with me that I have been single for years?

What am I doing wrong that is making me repel men and make others just want sex, friends with benefits or just use me to get to one of my friends?

It's so hard to have to pretend that nothing is wrong when on the inside my heart wants someone that is just for me

I want all the cute relationship things and have a real Godly man that sees me as more than just a ''good friend'', counselor, crazy black woman

There is more to me I promise, if you just look inside of me and see my heart

It's big and open for love, passion, care and compassion

I have so much love to give if the right person would come along
It's so hard to see all the people I know getting married, engaged or starting serious relationships when your still by yourself

I just have to deal with it but that doesn't necessarily make it any easier

Why must it be so hard?

Why can't I be like some people and not think about relationships or future things?

Why can't I just not worry about it or think about it

It's hard, no matter what I seem to do

It's so hard